“It really struck me that we have to move from trying to dominate and control situations to try and collaborate more with people. And that takes creativity, particularly when harms happen.”
Rod Friesen has spent all of his nearly 40-year career in the non-profit sector and has learned many lessons in peacebuilding along the way. In the first episode of Season 6 of Undercurrents, MCC Ontario’s podcast, Rod shares some of these stories of peacebuilding – from dealing with a difficult city counsellor, to training prison guards in Zambia. Each of these stories has a lesson that we can apply to our own lives.
One of these lessons is that peacebuilding – whether system-wide or interpersonal with someone you’re in a relationship with – takes time. This is both reassuring and frustrating. If you’ve ever been to a political protest or rally, you’ve probably heard the chant “What do we want? [name your thing]! When do we want it?? NOW!” But change rarely happens “now.”
In Matthew 13:3, Jesus gave the parable of the farmer who scattered seeds on rock soil, or among thorny plants, and some on good soil, which bore lots of good fruit.
There’s a lot of wisdom here. We can think of any conversation we have as seeds we plant - we might not have seen the change or the introspection or shifting of the needle in that interaction. But it might have planted a seed. The question is: has it landed in good soil, rocky soil, or weedy soil?
The good news is, as any gardener or farmer can tell you, even poor soil can be rehabilitated to become rich and fertile again. What does that mean for us when we’re trying to plant a seed of peace in a thorny relationship? Maybe we need to work in the compost of compassion, or the nutrients of non-anxious presence, or the fertilizer of mutual respect and grace.
Listen to the whole conversation with Rod here.
Or watch the episode on Youtube!
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Undercurrents is sponsored in part by Kindred Credit Union.